Fearful flyers often hide their fear of flying from their closest friends or even from their partners.
The strain put on relationships when this happens can be enormous, the feelings of guilt and weakness for the person causing the ‘problems’ are considerable. They feel totally and solely responsible for the ensuing chaos, which then leaves a legacy of worry for the next occasion. We say that the first thing to do is overcome the fear, then worry about others … it’s actually what their friend or family would prefer. Join Premium
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The supporter's role
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we will show you how to make a simple ‘contract’ between you and your supporter so that you can get the best from the arrangement. Quite often supporters don’t know exactly how to help and so they end up being an extra burden for the fearful flyer. Sometimes the person with the fear of flying wants everything their own way and believes that if someone is supporting them they ought to do exactly what the fearful flyer wants. In reality the supporter must do what the anxious flyer needs, not what they want.
And so a contract is essential.
The supporter should
- Be supportive but firm.
- Not give advice, give support.
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The anxious flyer must
- Explain what causes their anxiety.
- Tell the supporter exactly what sort of help they need i.e. conversation, silence, etc.
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